Wednesday, November 13, 2013

628 : A woman whose morals were lax...

Mad Kane has a regular limerick challenge.
She provides the first line,
the rest is up to us.

Illustration provided by a
New South Welsh reader.

A woman whose morals were lax,
Despite some corrective firm smacks,
Dressed up in deep scarlet,
And lived as the harlots
Who spent all the night on their backs.

◊◊

A duck, whose bowels were quite lax,
Had severe diahorrea attacks.
He thought it unfair
That he missed Medicare
And had to be treated by quacks.

◊◊

A fellow was terribly lax
In filling and filing his tax.
But in the auditor’s pursuit
They missed all his loot
Buried in the garden, in sacks.
.
---
© J Cosmo Newbery 2013
---

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34 comments:

  1. I was beginning to think you had forgotten how to write limericks...

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  2. And to think the Phantom was once considered to be a G rated family comic. I don't think it is politically correct to dress up in a phantom suit and spank womens' bottoms anymore.
    It's a bit porn passe :) Hilarious limerick !

    there once was a wee young lass
    who like being spanked on her ass
    she told all and sundry
    sent them pics of her undies
    now everyone knows - alas

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    Replies
    1. I've heard that they're out there. Only ever seen them on Desperate Housewives though.

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  3. ha. i have a hard time believing the gov't would not dig up the house to get their money...lol...yikes on the duck as well...

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    Replies
    1. True enough but, as a rule, a limerick does not provide a lot of commentary space! :-)

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  4. kinky old Phantom Guy
    raised his palm up very high
    gave a gift to Buxom Lass
    fifteen spankies cross her ass
    - both gave out a happy sigh

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    Replies
    1. I'm told that can be the result. =:-O

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  5. Betty of BabylonNovember 14, 2013

    A scarlet woman! There's a term I haven't heard for a while.

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    Replies
    1. Come on, tell the truth. How did you meet up with us? Caught red handed with a scarlet woman?

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  6. This is being a portion of the society that I am being unfamiliar with.

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    Replies
    1. Do you want that to change?

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    2. You should know it - it has been around a while.

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  7. Does he need a sidekick?

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    Replies
    1. "The Ghost who whines"? I'm thinking 'No'. Hang on, are you talking about the Phantom or the duck? How about "The Ghost who waddles"?

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  8. Morther GooseNovember 14, 2013

    I can't help but feel that the duck is missing out in this conversation.

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    Replies
    1. Isn't that a euphamism for something naughty?

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    2. Come on! Bring it on! Ruffle my feathers!

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    3. Careful, you may meet up with The Ghost who stalks!

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    4. Oxford ChappieNovember 14, 2013

      "Morther" - nasty accent you have there, Ma.

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  9. I have missed your limericks. And would like to see the third person afflicted with the duck's ailment. I suspect rather than his loot being buried, it is protected by loop holes...

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  10. Oh, dear. Sorry for the duck; he should have stayed in Canada.

    As for the woman and the cheat, I suspect they got what they deserved.

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  11. I think the duck would have been more at home with Mandrake, than with the Phantom.

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  12. Hero, the Horse.November 14, 2013

    The lady was lucky. When he smacked me he wore spurs as well.

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  13. See...The Phantom, The Ghost Who Walks...he started it all...it wasn't Christian Grey and "Fifty Shades" after all. The Phantom even wore shades!!!

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  14. Oh Dio Mio ! What have I stumbled on here? A den of iniquitous poets ! I shall beat a hasty retreat:)

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    Replies
    1. Yes, stay and play!

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  15. If you whip cream, you get butter. Perhaps if you whip a woman you will get....no, no, let's not go there.

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    Replies
    1. Stay with the duck, it's safer.

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    2. I thought ducks had permanent diahorrea.

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    3. Cows too.

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