Sunday Whirl (Wordle #93) presents a list of words
that we must incorporate in a writing piece.
The words this week are:
chimes, curved, edge, mirror, mist, raw, scale, scattered, skirted, straw, tattered, vast.
Reflections.
We never really see the good times
Skirted until well past.
Reflections are distorted, curved,
And our memories don’t last.
The clock of life moves on and chimes
To mark the life we’ve cast:
Life is short, as someone observed,
And the scale beyond is vast.
So, in the tattered fragment of life
Given to us to share,
The edge, raw as it draws nearer,
Is a straw that we must bear.
Existence is scattered with strife,
Though hope beats back despair;
And hearts drawn in mist on mirrors,
Are a fleeting sign we care.
---
© J Cosmo Newbery 2013
---
I like the rhythm of your poem. So many great, true lines - reflections distorted, scale beyond is vast, and my fav are the mist hearts drawn are a fleeting sign we care!
ReplyDeleteBounced through that, but not without catching the built-in messages...
ReplyDeleteThe form suits the wordle words, and I enjoyed your poem.
ReplyDeleteBearing a straw can sometimes be the heaviest weight of all, I think...
ReplyDeleteWhirling with James Joyce
Just wonderful and thoughtfully written dear J Cosmo and the image too.
ReplyDeletexoxoxo ♡
Love how you married the words to the image in your final stanza. Lot of wisdom and truth in your poem,
ReplyDeleteElizabeth
My gut response was to acknowledge the truth here, and to realize the great value of living in the Now, of being totally present, of recognizing and appreciating all that is.
ReplyDeleteWhat a remarkable poem! Those little hearts are indeed the difference between hope and despair. Fine work--the rhymes are impeccable.
ReplyDeleteLovely cadence! The last lines took my breath away!
ReplyDeleteHi Cosmo, how nice to read a rhyming poem...really enjoyed the fluidity. Now that I figured out there's a Mr Linky on the site...thanks to Pamela...I'll be able to visit more often. :)
ReplyDeletegreat rhyme and full of truth. Well done!
ReplyDeleteI like your rhyming poem with the wordle words. They fit well with the picture. Thanks for visiting my blog.
ReplyDeleteThere is unbearable sadness in this poem especially the hearts drawn on the misty mirror which fades so quickly and is gone like so much in life.
ReplyDeleteYou're so creative! Loved the way you've imbibed those words in your poem.
ReplyDeleteNot only have you woven the (pretty difficult to use) wordle words beautifully into a rhyme, the poem itself is so beautifully poignant that it touches a chord deep within.
ReplyDeleteOh this is lovely J. Definitely one to read again.
ReplyDeleteLoved the flow of this and what a great job of creating such a deep piece from a list of words.
ReplyDeleteLovely words, well penned.
ReplyDeleteSecret mirror messages. I also remember drawing pictures in misted breath on back seat windows during long car rides as a child to stave off going bonkers. As you say the directions we take are unique. Thanks for your visit :)
ReplyDeleteJ Cosmo, you write the most meaningful wordles! I especially enjoyed the last stanza -- what a romantic you are! (Smiles)
ReplyDeleteI'm liking these, J.C. For me it will be a toss up between the second verse and the last, the first three build up life and last is a warning that it won't be all 'a bed of roses.'
ReplyDelete..
A lovely message in the last stanza, J Cosmo.
ReplyDeletePamela
The last two lines especially....great note to end on!!
ReplyDeleteYes we have to enjoy the now so the thought of a lost life will not cross your mind as the years grow short. Nice write J.
ReplyDeleteHope does beat back despair in most cases. That line makes the light at the end of the tunnel relevant. Melancholy tinged with awesome. Loved it.
ReplyDeleteI'm always a sucker for "hearts drawn in mist on mirrors". There's something very special about it. Lovely poem.
ReplyDeletelove those hearts drawn on mirrors....life is the good and bad...some times the scale tips a little far either way...and in those we need those hearts...
ReplyDeleteYou haven't given up until you don't take showers anymore.
ReplyDeletePhew, that's really good!
ReplyDeleteMine’s HERE
J you did a remarkable job with those words and that image--wow, that ending had me swooning :-)
ReplyDeleteA lovely voice, here. You got me with the first two lines, as they are oh, so true, and ended on a very lovely image.
ReplyDeleteVery cool idea for poem - the close especially vivid. k.
ReplyDeleteWhere do all these people come from ???!!!
ReplyDeleteI especially like the last stanza and image.
xxx
Eek! Surely there's more than 'this tattered fragment of life' given to us to share...nor not ...exceptional reflection ;)
ReplyDeleteThe detail elements make this an exceptional piece... the curve, vast scale, raw edges, tattered fragment... All lend to a visual interpretation as well as a gut-level assessment of life being what we make of it.
ReplyDeletea lovely reflection. I like the sentiment in the final stanza.
ReplyDelete