Sunday, November 25, 2012

CDIX - The Blue Stones




Sunday Whirl (Wordle #84) presents a list of words that we must incorporate in a writing piece.  
I hadn’t tried this before, finding the number of words to use a bit daunting.  
Inger-M said that she was sure that I could do it.  How could I not try?

Amateur psychologists please note that this is complete fiction.

The words this week are: 
fill, scent, sway, held, fell, sight, fleck, still, end, load, skimmed, heap.


Flecks of sunlight from the water erupted on the impact of the stone.

It skimmed the surface, bounced three times and fell from sight.

He watched as the surface absorbed the impacts, reacted, adjusted 
and, in the end, was still.

Still.  

He missed her.
He missed her smile.
He missed the scent of her perfume.
He missed the taste of the nape of her neck.
He missed the sway of her hair when she laughed.

But he had a load of time to fill.

Still.

He picked up another stone from the small heap beside him, 
held it briefly, feeling it’s rough warmth, and threw it into the lake.

It skimmed the surface, bounced three times and fell from sight.
.
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© J Cosmo Newbery 2012
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22 comments:

  1. Very nicely done dear J Cosmo!
    xoxoxo ♡

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  2. Oh well done J Cosmo, glad Inger-M persuaded you to have a go at the Sunday whirl. We would never even know we were reading a wordle. The words all blended in so well.
    What a sad tale. I could see this poor guy and hear the plop of stone as he tossed it into the lake.
    Lovely piece.

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  3. I like what you did, and I think it is true....somewhere, sometime.....

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  4. - and you did so beautifully well! I can see him sitting there, in the sunshine, with his heap of stones, and time to fill...

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  5. This is so beautiful ... it flowed like a scene from a movie ... awesome !!!

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  6. Really glad you joined in. Will warn you, the wordles should come with an addiction warning attached to them. You did a wonderful job with these, creating a scene and emotions we can all identify with. Your repeat of the word "still" captures that need to hold it all in place less the least bit of memory should be lost. Bravo!

    Elizabeth
    http://soulsmusic.wordpress.com/2012/11/25/first-kiss/

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  7. I enjoyed this, and am glad you listened to Inger. I love the repetition of still, and the building of the piece on the page. Lovely write. Welcome.

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  8. Very clever, J Cosmo! So glad you gave doing a wordle a try. I enjoyed the scene you set and carried through!

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  9. Oh I do like this one. A thoughtful meditation on love.

    xxx

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  10. For a first timer, you did a fabulous job with the words, Cosmos.

    Pamela

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  11. Deft and deep. Nicely done.

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  12. oh, a melancholy moment, caught in the skip of a stone on water...I'd say you did great!

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  13. I really like this one...very expressive...you done well, Cosmo! :)

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  14. This is beautifully done :)
    I could so well picture him !

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  15. Hmm. The praise 'never say never' comes to mind. This is delightful. I actually remember one of my first boyfriends trying to teach me how to skip stones. But alas I wasn't his first...nor his last. We both moved on. That was over forty years ago!

    I actually wrote two, but as you've gifted a story I shall give you the link to mine:
    http://julesgemsandstuff.blogspot.com/2012/11/sunday-whirl-84-story-verse-appearances.html

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  16. well done indeed. excellent seamless incorporation of the words

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  17. Wow! Poignant, visceral, tactile, erotic, loving, visual, missing. Beautifully written.

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  18. I love your wordle. You must become a regular player. And thanks for visiting me.

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  19. I feel for this poor guy and his sadness. I like how you have all his missing piling up on each other.

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