This is a rework of the previous poem.
I had tried to do an hexasonnetta, a form
which uses 6 syllables per line, and found it clunky.
I have reworked it in a 8/6 pattern, keeping the original rhymes,
and am much happier with it.
The evening twilight is bringing
A stillness, without grace.
No fleecy jacket can erase
A shiver that is tingling,
And the birds have stopped their singing—
It seemed so out of place.
As the light is quickly fading,
The sense is of despair,
A numbing chill hangs in the air,
And shadows are parading
A sadness that’s all pervading,
It’s more than most can bear.
And, with the fading of the light,
The darkness of the night.
© J Cosmo Newbery 2013