CCCXLIV - Annoyances

Mama's Losin' It had the prompt 'List 10 things that make you angry'.

Well, I don't get angry so much, I get annoyed though.  Here a short list.

Some readers may notice similarities to a a song by Koko in The Mikado.
Some other readers may notice that Mama had a similar prompt four years ago
and marvel at the similarities in my approach then and now. 

COSMO

I’ve been asked to clearly state those things that can annoy:

I've got a little list — I've got a little list

Of nasty little things whose departure I’d enjoy

And who never would be missed — who never would be missed!

There’s the people who sanitize everything in sight

And those who say you’re sexist when in fact you’re just polite

All people who say they can’t but they never even try

All people who say ‘me’ when they really should say ‘I”

And homeopaths, astrologers and Chinese herbalists

They'd none of 'em be missed — they'd none of 'em be missed!

CHORUS

He's got 'em on the list — he's got 'em on the list;

And they'll none of 'em be missed — they'll none of 'em be missed.

COSMO

There’s the disappointing President who uses flying drones

To create new terrorists – I’ve got him on the list.

And the marketer who rings me, at home upon my phone,

They never would be missed — they never would be missed!

Then there’s idiots who give a mean, sarcastic poke

And, if you should complain, say you cannot take a joke,

And the climate change deniers who stubbornly maintain

We can go on polluting endlessly and never feel the pain

And those religious aberrations, the fundamentalists

I don't think they’d be missed — I'm sure they’d not be missed!

CHORUS

He's got 'em on the list — he's got 'em on the list;

And they'll none of 'em be missed — they'll none of 'em be missed.

COSMO

And that pesky little character of jingoistic hype,

The fervid nationalist – I’ve got him on the list!

And all journalists and anchormen and any of their type

They'd none of 'em be missed — they'd none of 'em be missed.

And the people who talk over me, in a patronising way,

But, in the end, apparently have nothing much to say,

All footballers, without a neck, in skin tight Lycra shorts

And all those wacky folk who believe the UFO reports

And that darling of the media, the Olympic medalist,

I don't think they’d be missed — I'm sure they’d not be missed!

CHORUS

You may put 'em on the list — you may put 'em on the list;

And they'll none of 'em be missed — they'll none of 'em be missed!

..

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© 2012   J Cosmo Newbery

With thanks to Gilbert & Sullivan.

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