Thursday, June 25, 2015

794 - That man Todd

Three Word Wednesday requires participants
to use the three words of the week in a composition.
The words this week were: nervous, puzzled, and lump.


That man Todd.

The nervous will oft close their eyes
As the barber deftly applies
The edge of the blade
To the lather he’s made
And to move is considered unwise.

But one barber with a habit most odd
Would dispatch all his clients to God.
He would then disguise
Their bodies in pies
Which puzzled the homicide squad.

To his credit, the cops all confessed
That his pies were considered the best.
What brought them up trumps
Was the absence of lumps
And a sauce that always impressed.
 .
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© J Cosmo Newbery 2015
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29 comments:

  1. Eww - but marvellous! I think i may avoid pies for a while ;)

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  2. The Barber of Seville~ I love your poem.

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  3. LOL Sweeny Tod of Fleet Street remembered so well!

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  4. Another day to be grateful to be a vegetarian.

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  5. Never buy a pie from a bakery with a barber shop nearby!

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  6. reckon I'm just more simple minded and so,
    The nervous, puzzled lump
    hoped to avoid being swept with a bump,
    shoveled and deposited in the dump,
    so rolled over and away it slumped.

    But then, it's always one way or the other, I suppose.
    Far too short to excite one to their toes
    or "too long, didn't read" even if prose.
    Ah well, he picked up his brushes and paints and away he goes.

    d=^))

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  7. Morbid but run off in a lighter mood very cleverly Cosmo!

    Hank

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  8. I'll have the cheese sandwich, if it's alright with you.

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  9. Well you didn't mince your words but he may have used one himself to rid the pies of lumps!

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  10. Great style and voice! Enjoyed that one very much...

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  11. Oh my, skilled in more ways than one. I wonder how he got rid of those lumps. Ha.
    I will say, I love a good straight razor shave with warm lather. I guess I better watch it though.

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  12. No pies for me, please!

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  13. I think I will wait for the pie in the sky.. I love the way you used the limericks here.

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  14. Oopss! I ll pass on the pies.. great poem though :D

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  15. i was thinking Dexter was the barber haha

    Awesome piece though

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  16. Ew, disgusting....but somehow the rhyming makes it rather charming!

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  17. it makes a strange twist, interesting..

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  18. So glad I don't eat meat. But I'll make sure and check the pies I eat are made only of fruit.

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  19. This made me chuckle. I am having fun reading this Sunday morning's offerings. The moon must be in a phase of some sort, LOL. This was really witty, Cosmo.

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  20. LOL

    have a good Sunday

    much love...

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  21. Oh so gross and so delightful at the same time!

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  22. Oh dear! Sweeney Todd, I presume. ;-)

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  23. "Trumps" to "lumps"--well done, humorous lines.

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  24. Well written, but the answer to the riddle is Sweeney Todd.

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