Notes on a Serviette

Friday, June 30, 2017

1048 - Off-Colour

Off Colour.

You coloured your hair.

Makes you look older than me.

I’m not complaining.

---

1047 - Marrow Minded

Marrow Minded

There was a young woman from Harrow

Who had intimate sex with a marrow.

But when given a leek

She just gave out a squeak

Saying “Plenty of length but too narrow.”

---

1046 - The Panel

The Panel

Located elsewhere

Both in space and time:

Imagine their words.

A mentor panel—

People who you can respect.

Ask their opinion.

Consider their views,

Tell them what you are thinking.

Would they be proud?

---

1045 - Liquid Assets

Liquid Assets

Creative juices—

Going with the flow, I guess.

Fluid transmission.

---

1044 - Dewey Code 306.7

Dewey Code 306.7

A librarian, sweet and good looking,

Checked out books on history or cooking

And at the back of aisle ten

She checked out the men

With no need to make a booking.

---

Wednesday, June 28, 2017

1043 - Fishy

Fishy.

It’s the same old line:

Plenty of fish in the sea.

But who asked the fish?

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Tuesday, June 27, 2017

1042 - Not a Tea Shirt.

Not a Tea Shirt.

When the weather was excessively cold

Her t-shirt was a sight to behold.

While it spelled out “AA”

In an outstanding way,

It drove many to drink, I am told.

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Monday, June 26, 2017

1042 - Reflection

Haiku Horizons prompt: mirror

Reflection.

Bathroom mirrors lie.

A stranger looks back at me.

Who is that person?

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Sunday, June 25, 2017

1041 - Sit! Beg!

Mad Kane poses a regular limerick challenge.

The key word this week is ‘train’.

Sit! Beg!

Said a woman who was asked to explain

Why husbands were easy to train,

“With a beer at hand

They’ll obey your command

As the reward outweighs any pain.”

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1040 - Bum Voyage!

Midweek Motif: yoga

Bum Voyage!

A yogi, when asked to explain why

She contorted and twisted, would reply:

“So when that US boor

Starts a nuclear war

I can kiss my own bum good-bye!”

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1039 - Life Force

A North Melbourne footpath.

Life Force

Nature is a force of power,

Subtle but unrelenting;

Changes come not by the hour

But by constantly presenting.

Like a small but nagging child,

Nature is persisting.

In this way her petition’s filed

And will go on existing.

---

Tuesday, June 20, 2017

1038 - Bright Lights

Haiku Horizons prompt: bright

Bright Lights.

Starry, starry night.

Winter’s sky is shining down;

A most wondrous thing.

◊

The beauty is there,

Shining brightly above you:

You must lift your face.

◊

The artists see it—

The wonder of life, as is.

But we walk on by.

◊

Too briefly they shine:

Bright lights in a grey-stone world.

We love them too late.

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Sunday, June 18, 2017

1037 - Granny

Three Word Wednesday requires participants

to use the three words of the week in a composition.

The words this week are:

pasty, revel, scent

A pasty is a type of pie,

especially from Cornwall.

Camay was a brand of soap.

Granny

The scent of Camay—

Transports me back through time.

Grandmother's bedroom.

◊

The smell of pasties.

She flaked the vegetables.

Serve crispy, with sauce.

◊

A young tearaway?

A youth of wild reveling?

I can but wonder.

---

1036 - When?

Sunday Scribblings 2 prompt: When

When?

Eternal question:

When will [a something] happen?

Why are you waiting?

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Monday, June 12, 2017

1035 - Carpe Diem

Cartoon by Judy Horacek

(click to enlarge)

Carpe Diem

Impulsive choices.

Sometimes they are just so good,

Others are less so.

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1034 - Mr Dutton Regrets

Mr Dutton Regrets.

Misuse of power.

But don’t kill the messenger!

Truth is not a crime.

---

1033 - The One That Got Way.

Mad Kane poses a regular limerick challenge.

The key word this week is ‘wave’.

The One That Got Way.

There was an old sailor named Dave

Who’d never been near to a wave.

He just sat on the pier,

Drinking tankards of beer,

And boasting of the fish that he’d saved.

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1032 - Theft, Pure & Simple

Haiku Horizons prompt: steal

Theft, pure and simple.

Capitalism—

Please don’t label it stealing.

It is. But please don’t.

◊

First: they steal your joy,

Second: they sell you the cure.

Choose your addiction.

◊

They steal our climate

To dump their pollution.

But not near their homes.

◊

They create our fears

And then introduce laws

To steal our freedom.

---

1031 - Split Assessments

Split Assessments.

A lady with a split up her dress,

Deported with style and finesse.

All those who viewed her,

And inwardly reviewed her,

Differed by gender how they assessed.

---

Sunday, June 11, 2017

1030 - La Vache Qui Rit

La Vache Qui Rit

A guru once sat on a hill,

In search of a truth to distill.

But the mantra he espoused

Confused all the cows,

And they laughed, as naughty cows will.

---

1029 - Winter Showers

Winter showers

Weather is outside.

When it comes to attitude,

Showers are within.

---

1028 - Don't say you weren't toad!

Haiku Horizons prompt: kiss

Don't say you weren't toad!

Never kiss a frog!

When they promise you the pond—

They're amphibian.

---

1027 - You must come up!

Mad Kane poses a regular limerick challenge.

The key word this week is ‘no’.

You must come up!

When asked in for a coffee, post-show,

A choice is to be made, yes or no.

Some advise you decline

As it may make you recline,

But sadly there’s no way to know.

---

1026 - The Kiss

Haiku Horizons prompt: kiss

The Kiss

The meeting of lips.

Strange, if you think about it.

So best you don’t.

---

1025 - Rather Fluid

Three Word Wednesday requires participants

to use the three words of the week in a composition.

The words this week are:

murky, navigate, organic

Rather Fluid

Life is a fairly organic thing,

Fluid in so many ways;

With many streams to navigate

As we fulfill our days.

Some streams arouse and some elate,

Some are murky, some are clear,

Some make us want to rise and sing,

And some we’re wise to fear.

---

1024 - Wrong Question

Sunday Scribblings 2 prompt: where

Wrong question.

We focus on ‘where’

And chase the rainbow of ‘there’

Along roads of gold.

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Monday, May 22, 2017

1023 - Windows

Haiku Horizons prompt: window

(OK, for the pedants, mine are Senryus)

Windows

Modern day vouyeurs—

They watch the world pass them by

Through thin panes of glass.

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Sunday, May 21, 2017

1022 - A Titanic Disaster.

Three Word Wednesday requires participants

to use the three words of the week in a composition.

The words this week are:

crisis, decayed, embarrassment.

A Titanic Disaster.

Crisis? What crisis?

The media is lying,

There is no ice-berg.

◊

An embarrassment.

A cause for public concern.

When will we be safe?

◊

It can’t be decayed—

It is still so very new.

Yet there is a smell.

---

1021 - Careful Driving.

Mad Kane poses a regular limerick challenge.

The key word this week is ‘ride’.

Careful Driving

A less than demure young bride,

Took care when going for a ride.

The bumps on the road

Could dislodge her load:

Spectacular but not dignified.

---

Friday, May 19, 2017

Vale Boneman

Berry Connell

“Boneman”

??? - 2017

Here lies Berry,

Oft known as Boneman;

He made the world a better place,

As much as any man alone can.

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Monday, May 15, 2017

1020 - Roads

Haiku Horizons prompt: road

(OK, for the pedants, they are Senryus)

Roads

We forge our own road,

Blazing a trail through the rough.

Will others follow?

◊

You take the high road

And I will take the low road...

Both murmur “Ta, Mac!”

◊

They are everywhere!

Just where did they learn to drive?

Why aren’t they like me?

◊

The roadside café—

Cold and rather fatty food.

It’s a tradition.

---

Sunday, May 14, 2017

1019 - The President's Picnic

The President’s Picnic

If you turn on the news today

You’ll feel you want to cry

If you turn on the news today

Expect to see some lies.

For every lie that ever there was

Will be broadcast there for certain

Because the news is the way

The President fools the public.

Snow job time for Presidents

The little Presidents are having

A lovely time today.

Watch them as they change events

And then recant the previous day.

See them freely change the news

In any way they choose

They never make any sense

Behind the scenes the Russians and Saudis

Will take them out for drinks

Because they’re rich little Presidents.

Every President whose been bought

Acts in a treasonous way

There’s lots of marvellous cash to keep

And wonderful deals in play.

Behind the lies where nobody sees

They'll muddy the water as long as they please

'Cause that's the way the

Presidents fool the public.

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Sunday, May 07, 2017

1018 - If I Ruled The World

Three Word Wednesday requires participants

to use the three words of the week in a composition.

The words this week are:

seductive, tilt, urgent.

If I Ruled The World

It is a seductive thought:

That you matter.

That you know what should be.

That you can change the world,

Tilt it to align correctly

With what is right;

To address the urgent needs

As you see them.

Seductive, but wrong.

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Saturday, May 06, 2017

1017 - Paradise Island

Mad Kane poses a regular limerick challenge.

The key word this week is ‘made’.

Paradise Island

A ship-wrecked couple who displayed

Reluctance when contact was made,

Explained their position

Facilitated coition

So not really marooned, just mis-laid.

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1016 - Confected Outrage

Poets United Midweek Motif : News media

Confected Outrage

The media. It's called a medium

because it's neither rare nor well done.

Paraphrasing Ernie Kovacs

In a flow that just increases

Comes outrage, lies and sting.

The owners, sad, are unabashed,

Money, not truth, is king.

Fake news,

The twisted views

Rehashed

Not really

News at all;

Just a stream

Of opinion pieces

Meant to shock

And appall.

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Friday, May 05, 2017

1015 - Links

Haiku Horizon prompt: link

Yes, they are Senryus, not Haikus. Get over it.

Links

18 holes of golf;

Called a “round” for some reason—

A nice walk ruined.

◊

Thick pork sausages

Sizzling on the BBQ—

Someone pass the sauce.

◊

The proof of the link.

They say that it is missing

But look at Donald!

◊

We must remember—

No matter how strong the chain

The weakest link breaks.

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