Sunday Whirl (Wordle #111) presents a list of words
that we must incorporate in a writing piece.
The words this week are:
vault, halls, swirl, crave, throat, wind,
limbs, nimble, prairie, rapture, train, each
A Brief Blooming
The wind swirls across the prairies,
The land is strangely still.
A wolf clears its throat and howls,
It echoes through the hills.
Hunter gatherers, the nomadic tribes,
Travel for feeding’s sake,
They are necessarily nimble
As survival is at stake.
Cities appear, with their streets and halls,
Their limbs are clothed and warm;
Food is farmed and plentiful,
There is shelter from the storm.
They keep the wealth they cannot eat
In vaults beneath the floor,
Each sold on the rapture of novelty
And taught to crave for more.
Growth is the mantra of this world,
But we’re stealing from the larder,
Come the day when it all runs out,
Our life will get much harder.
Hunter gatherers, the nomadic tribes,
Travel for feeding’s sake,
Necessarily they are nimble
As survival is at stake.
The wind swirls across the prairies,
The land is strangely still.
A wolf clears its throat and howls,
It echoes through the hills.
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© J Cosmo Newbery 2013
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Love the photo image you chose to go with your poem. Will we really ever learn the lesson you have woven with these words? I like how you repeated the stanza about the hunter gatherers. A good reminder of balance to all.
ReplyDeleteElizabeth
http://soulsmusic.wordpress.com/2013/06/02/awakening-a-body-once-living/
Love the sentiment - and the structure makes it even more effective. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteI really like the repetition of the two stanzas and the howling wolf leaves me with a haunting feeling.
ReplyDeleteThis is excellent, use of wordle words, strong message, flowing rhythm. What more could we ask?
ReplyDeleteNice rhyme and rhythm!! A great perspective, you have studied the minds of nomadic tribes well, whichever part of the world they may be!!
ReplyDeleteThat last stanza is a fine finish.
ReplyDeleteThe great circle deftly described.
ReplyDeleteVery nicely you have shown us the future, we should better care for this nature..
ReplyDeleteThe wolf really makes this piece. This is my favorite part: "Growth is the mantra of this world, But we’re stealing from the larder"
ReplyDeleteGreat images and perspective and agree with henna on that favorite line - which will linger and stand as a lone wolf for some time to come :)
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing the wolf this week. Growth as mantra demonstrates that instinct for survival beautifully.
ReplyDeletenice bookending of the stanzas, works very well.
ReplyDeleteWhat a gentle, yet powerful way to convey the message in your poem. I envy your ability to rhyme!
ReplyDeleteLove the message here, and the rhythm is wonderful, J Cosmo.
ReplyDeletePamela
Again, brilliant. I am sounding redundant. I'll just keep reading. Love your message, "we are stealing from the larder," and your poetry.
ReplyDeleteVery well written!
ReplyDeleteMindless complacency and desire for the useless, yet no one seems to care. I like that your poem is a round where we will head back from whence we came.
ReplyDeleteI love that most poets are writing from the prairie. It's an excellent easel for a poet!
ReplyDeleteI love the history and the vivid imagery you tucked in every line, J Cosmo. You have a way with words.
ReplyDeleteI like this very much. The rhythms flow well - but not too well - the rhymes are cleverly worked out and the form suits the work. Your "message" comes across loud and clear, but with subtlety also.
ReplyDeletewe have settled quite comfortably but it all can change very quickly..nicely penned...love the images of the last stanza esp.
ReplyDeleteThey keep the wealth they cannot eat
ReplyDeleteIn vaults beneath the floor,
Each sold on the rapture of novelty
And taught to crave for more.
what a contrast eh? and what a condemnation of the world we have created....rather sad when all we know is conquest...
I love the message here--and I though this was really well written--and I agree with many above--love the last stanza
ReplyDeleteI really like how you opened and closed this rhythmic flow with the same stanza..
ReplyDeleteLove the echo, and the message.
ReplyDeleteGreed comes to mind...
ReplyDeleteLiving in Wisconsin, in the prairie, I understand the farmer, the gatherers, if you will. Living in Madison, I see the dirty underbelly of corruption in the worst way - a governor who was paid for by the Koch Brothers. I see the rich hoarding it like they can take it with them.
ReplyDeleteThis one cut to the bone, Cos, and I am so impressed! Peace, Amy
Appreciate the commentary and great use of the words.
ReplyDeleteWow this is absolutely incredible, filed with wisdom and warnings. Gorgeous writing
ReplyDeleteWonderful:) Greetings
ReplyDelete