Wednesday, February 18, 2009

CXVII - The Yellow Frocked Ladies

While looking for an illustration for my previous post on screens, I found this one.
Entitled "Smoke Screen 1958" it cries out for a limerick. I have three...

A yellow frocked lady from Stoke
Flavoured her vagina with smoke.
"It's feminine trickery,
I recommend hickory
If you want to attract a good bloke."

(Does this make it a 'hickory dickery dock'?)


A yellow frocked lady from Belize,
Raised her clothing high over her knees
Then she stood very still
In front of the grill
In order to drive away fleas.


A yellow frocked lady from Blake
Had a barbecue down by the lake;
While the meat went brown
She raised up her gown
As her husband liked sauce with his steak.

© J Cosmo Newbery
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  1. I believe it would be a 'hickory dockery dick'... but since that doesn't rhyme, we'll go with yours.

  2. I can go with hickory dickery dock.

    Who said you weren't ready for the limerick contest?

  3. yikes!

    in order to make the heart symbol on a mac type ..... plushearts; ....

    but use the plus symbol for hearts

  4. I thought we were in for reruns of "Leave it to Beaver".

  5. well, stirring your drink,
    a hickory daquri stick stink
    might make it tasty
    no sense to ask me,
    Though, because I no longer 'clink'.

    But the gal with the fleas?
    It's probably true enough, if you please,
    We once had an old cat
    who itching in the smoke sat,
    I guess it's good to get'm off pussies?

    While the first sounds intriguing, quite...
    The last seemed a bit of spite
    alas, the fellow
    was probably not mellow.
    But, I'de still prefer Dr. Pepper, make it a (diet)

  6. ♥ Foam

    Thank you for an education.

  7. Hickory Dickery Dock... definitely my favorite. Loved the trickery/hickory rhyme. You're so fresh!!

  8. Love it! Especially the last one. Very, um, saucy.

    Hey, it's late, give me a break.

    Thanks for stopping by my blog - I'll be visiting you again!

  9. OK, what about...

    There once was a girl from Venezia
    Who would work very hard just to please ya
    She'd hoist up her skirt
    She knew well how to flirt
    And the boys would go weak at the kneezia

    lol sorrrrrry!!!

  10. Maybe this is where Burger King got the idea for their "Flame" perfume?

  11. wow.. you do limericks too?!!!!!!!

  12. I love the first one, made me squimish on the last two but with a smile!

  13. oh dear, I hope I haven't goofed
    when someone else's limericks I spoofed
    The rhyme wasn't the same
    as the usual game
    but, I wondered later if I should have proofed....
    (she wrote them AABBB
    instead of AABBA)

  14. You are so funny! I love these ... and what a saucy little picture! Can see why it inspired you! And you stayed true to the dirty little side of the limerick form! YAY!

    And noot often you see "vagina" in a poem.

  15. Excellent've put the beginnings of an idea in my head. I'll be back when it is finished.

    Thanks for stopping by my blog also, was surprising to see you are from down's a small world sometimes hmm?

  16. we go.

    There was a young lady named Venus
    With her grilling she was quite famous,
    "Of steaks I am fond,
    And my chicken is gourmand,
    But my favorite of course is roast penis.

    I admit, not as good as yours but in the same 'flavor'? lol

  17. There was a man once that was bawdy
    Did his craft without seeming gawdy
    Yellow frocks if you please
    Please tell me they tweeze
    Sending smoke signals up to their totties.

  18. I don't have any more modifiers to describe how much I enjoy your poetry and your sense of humor. Humor is the #1 attribute in my book.

  19. numberonesistah: Lovely! But I don't think I should take credit for putting that idea into your head!

  20. Just hilarious in a very risque kind of way!

  21. Oh, dear. :) Those were funny.

  22. You must have a huge brain to find all of this inside your head! Where does it come from??


  23. Too funny! I like the first one better. The third one cracked me up though...sauce. By the way I've noticed you comments on other are very funny, witty, rude and all that good stuff. (Rude in a good way!)


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